Journey to the Cross
Sin – Up Close, Personal, and Uncomfortable

Morning Meditation

Read Psalms 32:2-5
Ps 32:2-5 NIV
Blessed is the man whose sin the LORD does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the LORD" — and you forgave the guilt of my sin.

• Blessed is the man in whose spirit is no deceit. Quietly check your spirit.
• Are your bones wasting away and your groaning long? Allow God to search your heart.
• Do you feel as if your strength is sapped? Prepare your heart to acknowledge your sin.
• Anticipate the joy of confession.

Morning Prayer

• Ask God to give you the courage to honestly face yourself and your sin.
• Ask God to be gentle as He reveals the sin in your life.
• Tell God your joys, fears, and needs. Praise Him in everything.
• Pray for knowledge of God’s will for you today and the power to carry that out.
• Ask the Holy Spirit to interpret the scriptures you are about to read.

Morning Bible Study

Lent is a time to examine the sin in our lives. The word for sin in the Hebrew is awen. It means "iniquity; vanity; or sorrow." Because of the roots of the word, there is an implication that awen means the absence of all that has true worth; hence, it would denote "moral worthlessness," as in the actions of wrongdoing, evil devising, or false speaking. The word sin in Greek is hamartia. It means “missing the mark.” It is the most comprehensive term for moral obliquity. (from Vine's Expository Dictionary of Biblical Words, Copyright (c)1985, Thomas Nelson Publishers)

The word sin is in the Bible 471 times. Admit it. We may not like it but at least God warns us – sin surrounds us and permeates our lives. If that news is not bad enough, sin is getting worse. Read 2 Timothy 3:1 and “don’t be naïve.”
2 Tim 3:1 The Message
Don't be naive. There are difficult times ahead.

There are indeed difficult times ahead as we grow closer and closer to the end times.

For examples of sin, read 2 Timothy 3:2-5.
2 Tim 3:2-5 The Message
As the end approaches, people are going to be self-absorbed, money-hungry, self-promoting, stuck-up, profane, contemptuous of parents, crude, coarse, dog-eat-dog, unbending, slanderers, impulsively wild, savage, cynical, treacherous, ruthless, bloated windbags, addicted to lust, and allergic to God. They'll make a show of religion, but behind the scenes they're animals. Stay clear of these people.

Sin is even in the church and that shouldn’t be a surprise. After all, people are going to make a show of religion but behind the scenes be animals. Again, we may not like the truth but at least God warns us.

• Do you know any “bloated windbags?” Are you one?
• What about the words cynical, ruthless, self-absorbed, crude, or contemptuous of parents? Recognize any of these?
• Are you someone people should “stay clear of?”

Difficulties and trying times make us particularly susceptible to sin but there is hope. Read Job 1:22.
Job 1:22 NIV
In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.

While it might be rare, it is possible not to sin when having difficulties. Look at all Job went through. Even though he was blameless, his friends blamed his problems on sin. One would think he had earned a long bout with doubt or self-pity but somehow, he managed to avoid it. Amazing but true!

If you are wondering how not to sin, read Matthew 5:29-30.
Matt 5:29-30 NIV
If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

It is so simple. We figure out what is likely to make us sin. We gouge it out and throw it away. Recovering alcoholics, drug addicts, and compulsive overeaters know this to be true. To recover, they must spend the rest of their lives gouging out and throwing away their “drugs of choice.” It may be simple, but is certainly isn’t easy.

Sin is serious. Read Matthew 18:6.
Matt 18:6 NIV
But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.

It would be better to have a large millstone hung around his neck and be drowned in the depths of the sea than to cause someone else to sin. Think about that the next time you:
• Lash out at someone or hurt their feelings, causing them to want to retaliate.
• Complain about your pastor and make others doubt his leadership.
• Involve others in gossip by listening or passing it on.

The message not to sin is a personal one to us. The focus of examining sin is to be on us and not others. Only when we are sinless, can we judge. Read John 8:7.
John 8:7 NIV
If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."

At the risk of committing the sin of judgment, one has to wonder about the “honesty” of anyone who thinks they are without sin.

So, what is sin? Practically speaking, it is anything that breaks one of the many laws of God. There are plenty of sins to choose. The words “Thy shalt not” are written in the Bible 240 times, beginning with the Garden of Eden. “Thy shalt not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil!” (Gen. 2:17) You probably know the end of that story. Adam and Eve ate from the tree. That knowledge of good and evil was as useless to them as it is to us. They continued to commit evil anyway, much like us today.

If you want to see an extensive list of ways to “miss the mark” before God, read Exodus 23:3-17, 2 Corinthians 12:20, and Mark 7:20-23. These are but the tip of the iceberg.

Ex 20:3-17 The Message
No other gods, only me. No carved gods of any size, shape, or form of anything whatever, whether of things that fly or walk or swim. Don't bow down to them and don't serve them because I am GOD, your God, and I'm a most jealous God, punishing the children for any sins their parents pass on to them to the third, and yes, even to the fourth generation of those who hate me. But I'm unswervingly loyal to the thousands who love me and keep my commandments. No using the name of GOD, your God, in curses or silly banter; GOD won't put up with the irreverent use of his name. Observe the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Work six days and do everything you need to do. But the seventh day is a Sabbath to GOD, your God. Don't do any work — not you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your servant, nor your maid, nor your animals, not even the foreign guest visiting in your town. For in six days GOD made Heaven, Earth, and sea, and everything in them; he rested on the seventh day. Therefore GOD blessed the Sabbath day; he set it apart as a holy day. Honor your father and mother so that you'll live a long time in the land that GOD, your God, is giving you. No murder. No adultery. No stealing. No lies about your neighbor. No lusting after your neighbor's house — or wife or servant or maid or ox or donkey. Don't set your heart on anything that is your neighbor's.

2 Corinthians 12:20 The Message
I do admit that I have fears that when I come you'll disappoint me and I'll disappoint you, and in frustration with each other everything will fall to pieces — quarrels, jealousy, flaring tempers, taking sides, angry words, vicious rumors, swelled heads, and general bedlam.

Mark 7:20-23 The Message
He went on: "It's what comes out of a person that pollutes: obscenities, lusts, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, depravity, deceptive dealings, carousing, mean looks, slander, arrogance, foolishness — all these are vomit from the heart. There is the source of your pollution.

If there are so many sins, how do we get it right? The answer lies in the cross. When we sin, like the scripture in the opening meditation, our strength is sapped. We accept our inability to live by the law and turn to grace. Read James 5:15-16.
James 5:15-16 NIV
If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

Believers of Jesus Christ are to confess sins to God and to each other and accept the fulfillment of the law, Jesus Christ. Only then, are our prayers powerful and effective.

Unfortunately, most of us journey back and forth from sin to the cross many times throughout our lives. While our eternal salvation may be secure, we are perfectly capable of condemning ourselves to a “hell on earth” if we avoid regular trips to the cross. Use this “Season of Lent” to return to the cross. Examine your life. Use the above scriptures to identify the sins in your life. Become willing to “Gouge them out.”

Application

Ben was an alcoholic. To fund his disease, he broke into houses in the middle of the night and robbed them. In desperation, he cried out to God. God heard and sent him to Alcoholics Anonymous. Ben confessed his sins and asked forgiveness. Ben learned that in order to recover, he would have to give up alcohol for the rest of his life. God required even more of him. He felt the voice of God gently urging him to go to each house he had robbed, apologize, and offer to make restitution.

One by one, he checked the houses off his list. His victims were amazingly forgiving. Realizing Ben was financially destitute and rebuilding his life, most forgave him instantly without requiring anything further.

Finally, he arrived at the last name on his list. He had done damage to this house and was dreading the confrontation. He procrastinated longer than he should and became tortured emotionally. Not wanting to return to drinking, Ben knocked on the door of this family and quietly told his story. The man and his wife were stunned. The women burst into tears. “Thank you so much for telling u,” she said. “Up until now, we had thought our son had done this to us. We had completely cut him out of our lives.” Ben’s “journey to the cross” restored a family’s love. Like Ben, our journey to the cross can have the same miraculous outcome.

Look at yesterday’s list of your darkness. Reread at the above lists in Exodus 23:3-17, 2 Corinthians 12:20, and Mark 7:20-23 and notice what sins contribute to your darkness. Make a bulleted written list of your sins.
• Have you been a gossip?
• Are you mean spirited?
• Have you committed slander, lust, or fornication?
• Where have you been dishonest, fearful, selfish, or prideful?

Be fearlessly honest. God already knows where you have sinned and is patiently waiting to restore your strength. Take a deep breath, pray, and proceed. Keep this list for use in our future devotions together.

Journey to the Cross - Discipline or Release

Journey to The Cross
Lent - Discipline or Release?

Morning Meditation

Read Revelations 3:19-21

Rev 3:19-21 NIV
Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. To him who overcomes, I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I overcame and sat down with my Father on his throne.


• Praise God for His loving discipline.
• Listen as He speaks.
• Open the door of willingness.
• Anticipate the joys of being an “over-comer” this Easter.

Morning Prayer

• Ask God to reveal everything that is getting in the way of your relationship with Him.
• Ask God what Spiritual Disciplines you need to practice this season of Lent.
• Ask God to reveal any strongholds in your life.
• Commit to using this Easter season to growing closer to God.
• Tell God your joys, fears, and needs. Praise Him in everything.
• Pray for knowledge of God’s will for you today and the power to carry that out.
• Ask the Holy Spirit to interpret the scriptures you are about to read.

Morning Bible Study

Have you ever wondered where the word “Lent” came from? An old English word meaning spring, Lent is named for the season in which it is celebrated. It is 40 days long (minus Sundays) because forty days is a significant number in the Bible. It is an amount of time traditionally set for discipline, worship, or study.

Read Exodus 24:18.
Ex 24:18 NIV
Then Moses entered the cloud as he went on up the mountain. And he stayed on the mountain forty days and forty nights.

• How many days did Moses stay on the mountain?
• What do you think Moses used this time to do?
• What spiritual disciplines do you think he used during this time?

Read 1 King 19:8.
1 Kings 19:8 NIV
So he (Elijah) got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God.

• How long did it take Elijah to travel to the Mountain of God?
• What do you think he thought about as he made this journey?
• What disciplines do you think were necessary as he made this journey?

Read Jonah 3:4-5:
Jonah 3:4-5 NIV
On the first day, Jonah started into the city. He proclaimed: "Forty more days and Nineveh will be overturned." The Ninevites believed God. They declared a fast, and all of them, from the greatest to the least, put on sackcloth.

• How long did God give Nineveh to repent in Jonah 3:4?
• What did the people use that time to do?
• What actions did they take as they sought God?
• What substances do you think they fasted from?
• What strongholds do you imagine they were trapped in?

Read Matthew 4:2.
Matt 4:2 NIV
After fasting forty days and forty nights, he (Jesus) was hungry.

At the beginning of His ministry, Jesus took time to be with God. Why do you think he did that?

Now read all of Jesus’ experience on the mountain in Matthew 4:1-11.
Matt 4:1-11 NIV
Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, "If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread." Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.'" Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. "If you are the Son of God," he said, "throw yourself down. For it is written: 'He will command his angels concerning you, and they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.'" Jesus answered him, "It is also written: 'Do not put the Lord your God to the test.'" Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor. "All this I will give you," he said, "if you will bow down and worship me." Jesus said to him, "Away from me, Satan! For it is written: 'Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.'" Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him.

What happened to Jesus?
Why do you think Satan used this time to tempt Jesus?
How did Jesus respond?

Perhaps the reason 40 days is so important is because it takes that long to release bad habits and develop new ones. Lent is time where we commit to spiritual discipline, confession, and renewal. Set this time aside in your life. Be honest with yourself. Spend this Easter season developing a deeper walk with God.

Application

Many religions recommend the discipline of giving up something for Lent. The act of giving up a pleasure is a discipline of our will. Spiritual discipline is essential to a close personal relationship with God and Easter season is a good time to reaffirm that relationship. By practicing spiritual discipline, we are able to focus our time and energy on a season of prayer. We come out of this period with a deeper understanding of God and ourselves.

Spiritual Discipline is a proactive action taken by spiritually growing people. It is an act of submission necessary for developing a deeper walk with Christ. People needing spiritual discipline may feel like they are coasting and want or need a spiritual boost. They may already have a deep walk with Christ but long for more of Him. At Lent, people give up things like movies, meat, sugar, carbonated beverages, or their free time. Many practice spiritual discipline during Lent by attending additional worship services, increasing time in prayer, meditation, and or Bible Study, or volunteering their services. A spiritual discipline may or may not need to be a permanent change in our lives.

Many confuse the need for spiritual discipline with the seemingly overwhelming task of seeking relief from strongholds. A woman that struggles with food addition attempted to give up sugar for lent and was frustrated because she was unable. A person struggling with a sexual addiction said she was giving up sex for Lent. That lasted about 3 days. I’ve seen people try to give up alcohol, drugs, shopping, and pornography, most not making it through Lent without a slip. The stronghold simply had too much power over them.

Seeking release from a stronghold is a desperate action taken by a desperate person needing spiritual, emotional, and or physical freedom. People trapped in strongholds have replaced God partially or completely with their stronghold. They find themselves in a downward spiral. A stronghold is poor substitute for God and typically has either left or is on the way to leaving a person spiritually, emotionally, and or physically bankrupt. Normally the only way to be released from a stronghold is to turn our lives over to God and to become willing to give it up the stronghold completely.

If you were to give up something for Lent, what would it be? Pray about it.

• What is the first thing that comes to mind?
• Are you seeking spiritual discipline or release from a stronghold?

If you are unsure of the answer, try taking from now until Resurrection Sunday to change the behavior. If you are unable to accomplish it or the act of accomplishing it is disturbingly painful, chances are, you are firmly in the clutches of a stronghold, which we shall talk about later in this devotional series.

If you are willing to commit to a spiritual discipline:
• Ask God for a suggestion.
• Listen to His answer. The “Still Small Voice” will make a quiet suggestion.
• Obey - call someone today and ask him or her to hold you accountable.
• Spend this Easter season growing closer to Christ.
• Expect Satan to attack and tempt you.
• Like Jesus, say “Away from me Satan, for I shall worship God!”

Journey to The Cross
Ash Wednesday

Morning Meditation

Read Song of Solomon 8:6-7
Song 8:6-7 NIV
Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away.

• Place God like a seal over your heart.
• His love is as strong as death. Bask in it.
• Rivers cannot wash it away. Feel the safety of it.

Morning Prayer

• If you are a child of Jesus Christ, praise God for sealing your life with the mark of His love.
• If you do not know Jesus Christ, ask Him to reveal Himself to you today.
• Tell God your joys, fears, and needs. Praise Him in everything.
• Pray for knowledge of God’s will for you today and the power to carry that out.
• Ask the Holy Spirit to interpret the scriptures you are about to read.

Morning Bible Study

The celebration of Ash Wednesday actually began in 900 A.D. The official name is “Day of Ashes.” It marks the beginning of forty days before Good Friday minus Sundays. On this day, many Christians choose to mark their foreheads with ashes in the shape of the cross, thus symbolizing that they belong to Jesus Christ. These ashes are a symbol of the spiritual mark or seal that is put on Christians when they accept Jesus into their lives.

Read Romans 6:3-18.

Rom 6:3-18 NIV
Or don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life. If we have been united with him like this in his death, we will certainly also be united with him in his resurrection. For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin - because anyone who has died has been freed from sin. Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace. What then? Shall we sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Don't you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey - whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you wholeheartedly obeyed the form of teaching to which you were entrusted. You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.

First, our old self is crucified so that our body of sin may be done away with. Now that we have died with Him, what is next for us?

Do we have a choice about how to live after we accept Christ?

What are we now to be slaves to?

The seal of ashes that churches put on foreheads are representative of the book Revelation’s description of righteousness. Read Revelation 7:3, 9:4, and 14:1. If you have time, read the scriptures before and after it.

Rev 7:3 NIV
Do not harm the land or the sea or the trees until we put a seal on the foreheads of the servants of our God.

Rev 9:4 NIV
They were told not to harm the grass of the earth or any plant or tree, but only those people who did not have the seal of God on their foreheads.

Rev 14:1
Then I looked, and there before me was the Lamb, standing on Mount Zion, and with him 144,000 who had his name and his Father's name written on their foreheads.

Study the scripture and answer the following questions:
• Where, on our bodies, are these marks?
• What happens to people with the marks?
• How are these marks used?
• What happens to people without the marks?

The reference to “sealing” in Revelations is a reference to a parallel scripture in Ezekiel 9:3-6.

Ezek 9:3-6
Then the LORD called to the man clothed in linen who had the writing kit at his side and said to him, "Go throughout the city of Jerusalem and put a mark on the foreheads of those who grieve and lament over all the detestable things that are done in it." As I listened, he said to the others, "Follow him through the city and kill, without showing pity or compassion. Slaughter old men, young men and maidens, women and children, but do not touch anyone who has the mark. Begin at my sanctuary." So they began with the elders who were in front of the temple.

• What happened to the people without the seal of God’s protection?
• Where was the seal?
• How do you feel about the harshness of what happens to people without the seal of God?

Application

Sarah grew up in church but had difficulty believing. “I simply did not believe in Jesus,” she told me. “When my life started falling apart, I was confused. I thought I was doing everything right. I had been to college and made good grades. My career was going well. I married and had children. But I was miserable and self destructive.”

Out of desperation, Sara sought Jesus Christ. She surrendered to His love and his way of life. She joined a church and became active. She bought a Bible and began studying it. Recently she said, “People that do not read the Bible have no idea how much better it can make their life.”

Sarah is sealed with the love of Jesus. She is reading the Bible and diligently applying it to her life. Her life improves each day. She happy and has a full life. She goes to a church that celebrates Ash Wednesday with the mark of the cross on their foreheads. Sarah’s forehead is marked with the seal of Jesus Christ.

Joan grew up in the same religion as Sarah and also had difficulty believing. “I believed until I was 9 years old. One Sunday, my Sunday School teacher taught a lesson where I heard that people actually voted on the deity of Christ. When I found out He only won by one vote, I realized how ridiculous it was to believe He was God.”

Not being a historian, I am not completely sure what her Sunday Teacher was teaching but this moment in Christian history caused Joan not to believe. The Religious leaders that voted “no” reached out from their eternal death and did harm to a nine-year-old girl. The irony is that while Joan continues to walk in darkness, these ancient religious leaders now know the truth.

“But Joan,” I’ve argued repeatedly, “People can’t vote on the deity of Christ. He either is or is not God and no vote could change that. Besides, why should we be surprised that He only won by one vote. We live in the world that crucified Him. I’m amazed that He won anything in a vote where humans were casting their lots.” My words continue to fall on deaf ears. Joan isn’t sealed with the mark of Jesus Christ.

We may not like the warning of God about what happens to people who are not sealed but a least God warns us. Do you wear the seal of Jesus’ love today? If so, take a moment and pray for Joan. If not, ask Jesus to reveal Himself to you today.

Are you living your life as if it is sealed? If not, confess to God.

Throughout your day, claim the protection of the seal of Jesus.
• When you are troubled, call His name.
• When you smile, praise Him.
• When you make a mistake, confess to Him, and apologize to others.
• Attend an Ash Wednesday worship service and thank God for His seal.

For today, wear His seal proudly and enter this Easter season with a spirit of gratitude.

Neighbor Needs - The Secret to Dealing With Chronic Pain and Related Depression - Part 6

Neighbor Needs

By Cheryle M. Touchton
The Pocket Full of Quarters Lady


The Sh’ma: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself. Luke 10:27 NIV

Do you know what your neighbor needs? Do you care? Pain has a way of stealing our energy for anything or anyone else but ourselves, causing us to become so self absorbed and needy that people close to us feel trapped. Instead of taking the world “by storm,” we take the world one hostage at a time, as our own needs demand the care of those who are unfortunate enough to care for us. Instead of loving our neighbor as ourselves, we need and demand more than most of our neighbors are willing to give. We sense their resentment, and our own resentments grow as self-pity drives us further into a needy nightmare.

I lost the 1970’s. Seriously, I have little memory of them. They passed in a pain and pain medication induced fog. I married in 1971, began compulsively binge eating, and stopped living. Eventually, weight gain destroyed my health as my body cried foul to the continual abuse. By 1975, health problems were in full swing and my mother and husband despaired over the amount of care I needed. I slipped on the ice and nursed an injured knee. I had a breast biopsy, a difficult pregnancy, gall bladder surgery, and a radical hysterectomy. I couldn’t take hormones so I was 26, had a small baby, and in full menopause. I hurt everywhere from the atrophy of inactivity and the damage to my body. Need I say more? I was the needy neighbor everyone first tried to help and eventually avoided. In the end, I was left with a resentful husband and a mother committed to nursing me back to health while making sure I understood how to avoid this problem in the future.

In 1979, I took stock of my life, put unnecessary food and any pain medication down, joined a support group for food addiction, and got out of bed. It was over a year before anyone even realized I was better. When family members grew ill in 1980, and I began helping, people were naturally dubious. I had to insist they let me help. It startled me to realize how self absorbed I’d become and what a drain I’d been on those who loved me. I vowed to spend the rest of life making amends. I did much damage to my body during that time and still have lingering difficulties, but I fully realize that if I’d continued on the path I was on, I wouldn’t be here. Today, when I hurt, I use it as a reminder of how I was, count my blessings, try not to whine, and focus on someone else. It works. Jesus knew what He was talking about when He told us that the most important thing we could do is to love God and others.

Neighbor Need #1: Resist the urge to give into others constantly taking care of you.

For people who occasionally have health problems, accepting help can be hard. They have to learn how to let others help them. For people with chronic pain, being taken care of can be a trap that we relax into and never return from. I must confess to finding relief in shutting my door, taking a pill, and letting Mama take care of everything else. Being constantly cared for is eerily similar to an addiction and even today, years later, my instinct is to flee from it. Now, miracle of miracles, when I grow temporarily sick, I have to make myself let others care for me. No more “needy neighbor” for me.

Neighbor Need #2: Do what you can for yourself.

No matter how ill we are, there are always things we can do for ourselves. My husband has the spiritual gift of service and knows when I’m in pain. Now that he is not feeling hostage to my pain, he naturally volunteers to do things for me when I’m in pain.

When someone offers me help, I apply a spiritual exercise of asking myself a couple of questions.

Question 1: Could I do this myself?

If the answer is yes, I ask a second question.

Question 2: Would it damage my body to do it myself?

If the answer is no, I do it for myself. I want to save my husband’s generous nature for when I really need it and keep my body moving as much as possible.

Neighbor Need #3: Do a small secret service for someone every day.

There is nothing like doing something secretly for someone else to get me out of myself and my own problems. It can be as simple as picking up a sock and putting it away without complaining or as elaborate as sending money anonymous to someone in need. It doesn’t matter what we do. It only matters that we do it.

Someone assigned me that task in 1979 and I was surprised to learn that I’d stopped doing things for others simply for the sake of doing it. When I did something for others, I demanded credit. I may have gathered a few rewards for my actions on earth but there were surely none stored up for me in heaven. Through the years, Bob and I have made a game of doing secret things for each other without getting caught. It is quite the trick to get away with it when the other person is expecting it.

Neighbor Need #4: Pray for the needs of others

There are so many ways to pray for others. We can seek out prayer lists and use our seasons of pain to pray for others. We can offer to assist with a prayer hot line from our home or be a part of our church’s prayer committee. God will hear and answer our prayers and we avoid the trap of self-pity.

During that time I was so sickly, my prayers were all about healing for myself. I felt sorry for myself and my prayers reflected it. Again, I was surprised to learn how self absorbed my prayers had become. Now, it is one of the greatest delights of my life to have the privilege of praying for others. I take intercessory prayer seriously, constantly seeking and giving it.

Neighbor Need #5: Constantly speak your faith aloud to others.

Speaking our faith aloud, reminds us of it and suddenly we have more of it. By speaking our faith aloud, we become inspiration to others and that will encourages us. Speaking faith aloud beats being the Neighborhood Whiner King or Queen and people around us become more willing to help when we really need it.

In high school, I often spoke my faith aloud. I led my then boyfriend and now husband, Bob, to Christ. Somewhere along the line, I stopped speaking my faith aloud. When I started again, I was timid but the results gave me confidence. Now, I’m often introduced as an evangelist and people tell me I have the gift of evangelism. I always laugh because I know that without God, I’m just a poor sick person, stuck in bed, and draining the energy out of everyone around me. For me, speaking my faith aloud is as essential as breathing because it keeps me healthy.

Neighbor Need #6: Forgive others for not taking care of you the way you expected or needed.

People are not perfect and sometimes we just have to pray, “Father, forgive them they know not what they do.” They grow tired of taking care of us and that weariness turns into understandable resentment. I can remember being so angry with my husband when he left me alone with my mother to go on what I considered an unnecessary business trip. It felt like he didn’t care. I later realized that he cared but he had to find a way to keep living. When I forgave him and loved him unconditionally, he turned into the kind loving caring husband I craved. Resentment poisons us and keeps us sick. We must forgive if we want to get well.

The trick to loving our neighbor as ourselves is to love God with our entire minds, hearts, souls, and strengths. If we do that, our bodies begin healing and instead of being the needy neighbor, we become the person who meets neighbor needs. It is worth the trouble it takes to stop working on anything in life except loving God and others.

This is the final part in the 6 part series on dealing with chronic pain and related depression. I sincerely hope these words have helped you. Below is a summary of the tips offered in this series:

• Mind Matters: Focus your mind on what is lovely about your life. Educate your mind about your condition and follow medical directions.
  
• Heart Helps: Fire self pity and decide to be happy.
  
• Soul Soothers: Deal with addictions or strongholds that are coming between God and you. Spend time every day in meditation, prayer, and Bible Study.
  
• Strength Solutions: Get out of bed and start moving. Eat right, exercise to the level possible for your condition, and get the help you need.
  
• Neighbor Needs: Stop thinking so much about your needs and begin meeting the needs of others. Do what you can for yourself and share your faith aloud.

================================================== Cheryle M. Touchton is the Director of Pocket Full of Change Ministries. For more information, to schedule a speaker for an event, or to make a donation, go to the website or call Gail Golden at 904 316-5462. Copyright: Pocket Full of Change Ministries

Strength Solutions - The Secret to Dealing With Chronic Pain and Related Depression - Part 5

Strength Solutions

By Cheryle M. Touchton
The Pocket Full of Quarters Lady


The Sh’ma: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself. Luke 10:27 NIV

Does your strength need solutions? If so, join the club – or should I say the gym? America is obsessed with strength and it seems like there are gyms on every street corner. Diet shows top television ratings, physical trainers have migrated from the west coast into Middle America, and dusty exercise equipment hides in the corners of many homes. Strength solutions are readily available. The trick is to apply them.

Our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and our job is temple maintenance. God gave some Cathedrals to maintain while others have simple country churches with sagging walls and peeling paint. Many spend their life grumbling about the temple they’ve been assigned or coveting the temple of others instead of loving their own precious temples and keeping them in the best condition possible.

Temple maintenance is relatively simple and scientific. We’re to eat right, get plenty of sleep, exercise, and go to specialists when necessary. There is a plethora of information available to tell us how to do that. The difficulty is having the spiritual discipline to do what is right. Add chronic pain to the mix, and we feel like resigning from our maintenance job. Here, we must remember two things – temple maintenance is always our job and we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.

Pain Leads to Decreased Energy Leads to Depression

Chronic pain drains energy like a thirsty bath tub drain sucks circling water into its wide mouth. We respond by slowing down, which lowers energy even more and weakens our body. Low energy mimics depression, causing us to seek medical remedies that have frustrating side effects and possibly might not be necessary. Synonyms for energy are vigor, force, or zeal. When we lose our zeal for life, we stop living. When we stop living, we stop moving. When we stop moving, our body weakens as our strength follows our energy right down that preverbal greedy drain. Resulting depression ensures that we stay in that lifeless state of misery and inactivity.

In my twenties, body aches from obesity, fibromyalgia, and other related chronic medical conditions lied by whispering I’d improve it I went to bed. I stayed in bed, believing I was doing the right thing, and the result was I grew weaker instead of stronger. The resulting weakness lessoned my chances of getting better. I wanted to live and felt sorry for myself because I was stuck in bed. Clinical depression followed, making it seem impossible to break the cycle. In 1979, I stomped my foot at pain, got out of bed, developed a close relationship with God, and did what He said. The results were that I begin living again.

This article is about loving God with your entire strength. The secret to building strength is to love God with the amount of strength you currently have and allow Him to replace your strength with His. As you serve Him, your ability to serve Him improves and you become stronger. When we stop focusing on our weakness and begin focusing on loving God with the strength we do have, we stop serving our poor battered body by giving in to the pain, and instead use what puny strength we have to live. We listen to God’s voice along with the voices of the medical community and are obedient to both because our motives are to serve God. We accept the pain we cannot change, gain the courage to change what we can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Below are some strength solutions I’ve found to work in my life.

Strength Solution #1: Daily, rate you pain between 1-10, with 10 being the highest, and react accordingly.

A nurse taught me to rate my pain level every day on a scale between 1-10. She asked me to think of a minor pain and make it my 1. I immediately thought of a paper cut. She then asked me what the worst pain I’d ever experienced. I struggled briefly, trying to decide between gall bladder attacks and child birth and finally made child birth a 9 and gall bladder attacks a 10. I’m told kidney stones are worse, but thankfully, I have not experienced them - yet.

I react to increasing pain levels by paying attention to what I did the day before and try to avoid it in the future. Now, most days, I stay somewhere between a 2-3, which is manageable. At a 4, I respond with alarm because I know that a 6 makes me what to go to bed.

Strength Solution #2: Seek legitimate medical help and do what they say.

Pain is actually our friend because it indicates that something needs attention. Studies show that 50% of Americans have experienced chronic pain. When our body is annoyed, it screams. Hopefully, those screams drive us to solutions. The advice of the medical community comes in various forms:

Medication

Before taking medicine, I ask if the medicine heals or masks the symptoms. Years ago, I was willing to take both but found pain relievers addictive and dangerous. They masked my symptoms and made it easier to do nothing. They made me sleepy, which drove me to more inactivity and increased pain levels. Today, I only accept medicine for pain relief, if my pain level is at 8 or higher.

Surgery

For some reason, surgery frightens me. I kept a gall bladder way longer than safety demanded due to fear and the inevitable surgery was brutal because of the delay. I learned my lesson. When I injured my knee, I was quick to accept the doctor’s surgical advice and only suffered a few weeks. If I trust my doctor and he or she says surgery is my best option, I stomp my foot at the demon fear and run (if I can) not walk to the surgeon. If I don’t trust my doctor, I find a doctor I do trust. The Bible repeatedly combines strength and courage and I refuse to be in pain due to fear.

Diet and Weight

Diet and weight have an astounding impact on pain. A key aspect of temple maintenance is proper nutrition. As I mentioned in an earlier article, I discovered that eating white potatoes daily increased my pain. Extra weight also increases my pain. I don’t like hurting and am willing to reduce any food that increases pain. Find out what foods help or hurt and respond accordingly.

A special note– if you find out a food is increasing your pain level and you eat it anyway or if you weigh more than is healthy, you may be addicted to food and need the help of an organization like Overeaters Anonymous. It is impossible to love God with all your strength when you’re addicted to any substance.

Exercise

I’m in favor of physical therapy, trainers, gyms, and any form of directed exercise. I have learned to be careful and seek the advice of the medical community before committing to an exercise plan. I’ve been to physical therapy for knee pain, fibromyalgia, and heal pain and the results were good – as long as I did what they said. A personal trainer helped me learn to move through pain and push to the level just before I do damage. I belong to a gym that has a program that works for my body. I’ve found nothing more beneficial for reducing pain than exercise. A note here is that exercise usually increases pain before it decreases it. Safely push through the pain to the results.

Talk Therapy or Other Mental Support

Stress and my reaction to stress increases my pain. Several times, I’ve used talk therapy to help through difficult situations. Those sessions were focused on single issues, were short in duration, and had good results. The trick with talk therapy is like anything else – take the medical advice offered.

Bed Rest

Rarely has a doctor actually suggested bed rest. The times that they did were brief and usually in response to an acute injury or procedure.
Pain lies by whispering, “Go to bed.” I’ve found that my doctor usually disagrees. I trust the doctors and do what they suggest.

Strength Solution #3: Get plenty of rest but not too much.

Our bodies need 7-8 hours of sleep. My body feels better if I get sleep the same time every night. I avoid work situations that require “all nighters” and the enticing cheaper “Red-eye” flights because they are not worth the cost to my body. There was a time in my life when I used sleep to avoid feelings. Now, I get enough rest but not too much. Too much rest reduces my energy and starts the pain cycle upward so I resist the urge to give into afternoon naps - except when sick or on the Sabbath.

Strength Solution #4: Recognize the difference between low energy and depression and respond accordingly.

There was a point in my life at which I still cared about things but my energy level wouldn’t power my aching body into action. Pain, low energy, and depression feel so eerily alike that it is hard to distinguish what is going on with our bodies. I’ve found it helpful to know the difference.

• Depression and low energy make us unavailable to family, friends, and co-workers. When depressed, almost nothing matters. When energy is depleted by pain, we still care but feel powerless to respond.
  
• Depression and low energy steel joy. When depressed, we have little or no memory of what joy feels like. With low energy, we recognize that we should be enjoying events and miss the experience.
  
• Depression and low energy send us to bed. Depression makes us feel too heavy to get up and we feel stuck. With low energy, if something is a high enough priority, we may not like it but can push ourselves in the short term to do it.

Unfortunately, low energy and resulting weakness, can eventually cause depression as the prolonged grief of missed experiences changes us mentally and physically. Energy increases energy so if our energy is low, we need to move more, eat better, and follow medical advice. Depression is clinical and needs medical attention. Know the difference. God wants us to love Him with all our strength. Some of us are naturally stronger than others but all can grow stronger. To date, I have not found a way to be pain free but I have found a way to reduce my pain to minimal levels and have a happy and productive life. What works for my body and my medical conditions are as follows. Your solution may be similar but will also have many differences.

• Nutrition – Years ago, I eliminated sugar, processed flour, high fat foods, and eating between meals. Recently, I have drastically reduced eating four legged animals. I average between 1400-1800 calories a day and take vitamin supplements recommended by my doctor.
  
• Exercise - I stretch 10 minutes every morning. I do a 30-minute low impact cardio, strengthening, and stretching workout at a gym 3 days a week and make sure I walk at least 5000 steps every day.
  
• Medical Advice – I get the recommended medical checkups and go to a doctor immediately when something new happens. I do what they say.
  
• Energy – I distinguish between low energy and depression and react accordingly. After my son died in 1995, I grew clinically depressed and needed medication for a few months. When my energy is low, I move more, even though I don’t feel like it.
  
• Rest – I sleep 7-8 hours a night and resist the temptation to sleep more – no matter how I feel.

I’m able to do all of this on the days I’m spiritually connected to God and able to listen and respond to His voice. On those days, I’m so good that I think I deserve the body of an Olympian athlete but alas, I’m just lumpy bumpy me stumbling through my days, some of them achy, and trying to be the best Cheryle I can be. What I will say is that I love my life and God and most days, pay no attention to pain. The next article will be about how you can reduce your pain by loving your neighbor as yourself. Until then:

• Believe you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you.
  
• Accept your temple maintenance job – eat right, exercise, get enough rest, and seek help when you need it.
  
• Ask God for the serenity to accept the pain you cannot change, the courage to change the pain you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

================================================== Cheryle M. Touchton is the Director of Pocket Full of Change Ministries. For more information, to schedule a speaker for an event, or to make a donation, go to the website or call Gail Golden at 904 316-5462. Copyright: Pocket Full of Change Ministries

Soul Soothers - The Secret to Dealing With Chronic Pain and Related Depression - Part 4

Soul Soothers

By Cheryle M. Touchton
The Pocket Full of Quarters Lady


The Sh’ma: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself. Luke 10:27 NIV

Does your soul need soothing? Chances are, if you are in chronic pain, it does. Chronic pain is a soul distraction. It screams so loudly that it is difficult to hear the Still Small Voice of God. I know from experience how hard it is to love God with your entire soul when you hurt so badly that pain consumes you. If you allow it, pain will literally steal your soul. Every thought, feeling, response, and action becomes about identifying the cause and treating the symptoms of pain. In short, you lose the essence of who you are as your soul bows to the demanding god of chronic pain. Below are signs that chronic pain is consuming your soul:

• People close to you are tired of hearing about your pain.
  
• You wonder if anyone cares that you are hurting.
  
• You are taking so much medicine that you have trouble focusing thoughts.
  
• Your body is growing lumpy bumpy from inactivity and/or an excess of food.
  
• Your sleep patterns are disrupted – from too much or too little sleep.
  
• You have waning interest in things of the spirit – personal time with God, Bible Study, or church.
  
• You feel hopeless that things will ever change.
  
• Every activity revolves around how you expect your physical condition to be.

Chronic pain lies by insisting it is the most important thing in your life. It is a demanding master that steals the pleasure from everything else. The only answer is to fire chronic pain as a god and replace it with Jesus - the Truth, the Way, and the Life. The Truth is that pain is not who you are. You are a child of God who happens to suffer from chronic pain. The Way is to stop surrendering to pain and replace it with surrendering to God. The Life is to refocus all energy consumed by pain to loving the God that created you for abundant life.

Soul Soother #1: Separate Yourself From Pain and Remember Who and Whose You Are

Do you know who and whose you are? You are not your pain. You are a child of God, loved by God. Your soul is the essence of who you are. You may be a person in pain but the pain is not who you are. Force yourself to think about yourself in relationship to the people around you and your joys, responsibilities, and dreams. As a young mother in her twenties, I had much to look forward to but all I could think about was my health. It felt like my life was over but that was a lie. Now, thirty years later, I live a full and productive life. I was able to go back to college and get an MBA, run a successful software company, and now am in full time ministry. I did all that while soaring at my roles as mother, wife, and now grandmother. How did that happen? It happened because God had plans for me that I could not see all those years ago. Let yourself dream again and take baby steps toward those dreams every day. Assume those dreams are God given and will be fulfilled. Let hope replace hopelessness. Remember who and whose you are.

Soul Soother #2: Be Honest About What Is Coming Between You and God

Before I could even think about hearing the voice of God and fulfilling His plans for me, I had to release all other gods. Because I was in pain, doctors freely offered prescription drugs. I didn’t feel like moving so I stayed in bed. I ate out of boredom and to avoid feeling my disappointment with life. In short, drugs, food, and inactivity had become false gods. I was a Christian who had no idea how many other gods she had put before the one true God.

Eat Right

The first thing I did was to start eating correctly. I stopped eating all unnecessary or unhealthy food, eliminated foods that triggered food cravings (like high fats, sugars, and processed flour,) and joined a support group to help me deal with food addiction.

Stop Drugs That Are Only Masking Symptoms

I explained to my doctor that while I wanted medicine to help my body heal, I no longer wanted mood altering addictive drugs. I was amazed at how much better I felt just from putting down pain killers. It turned out that my body was producing many symptoms just to keep me addicted to prescription drugs. When I stopped masking symptom, I was able to notice and respond to what foods and activities helped and hurt and over time, I improved. I also learned techniques that helped mentally block pain.

Start Moving Again

While we will talk more about moving our bodies in the next article, there was a spiritual component to deciding to start moving my body again. Since I didn’t feel like moving, I stayed in bed or on the couch way too much. I realized that inactivity had become a false god. The evil voice that whispered the condemning words, “Stay in bed,” wasn’t healthy and had to be fired. I went to physical therapy to learn safe techniques for improving pain. I got out of bed and began living life again. Over time, my desire to stay still left.

Soul Soother #3: Worship God

The most important thing I did to improve my situation was to develop a close personal relationship with God. I’d been a Christian since I was 8 but it wasn’t until 1979 that I began to spend disciplined time with God. A spiritual mentor instructed me to spend thirty minutes a day in meditation, prayer, and Bible Study. I had young children so I needed help reaching that goal. I explained to a dubious husband that we were both getting up earlier each morning and that he had “parent duty” for thirty minutes every morning. Now, thirty years later, I testify to the fact that my relationship with God has grown sweeter every day. I do hear that Small Still Voice and obeying that voice led me to being the productive person God intended me to be. As I write this, I am aware that my pain level today is a little high for me – a 4 out of 10. We recently moved and are in the middle of the Christmas season so I know stress and heavy lifting is contributing to increased pain levels. I will stretch, spend time with God, keep eating right, and in a few days, the pain will drop back down to a more manageable 1-2 out of 10. What I won’t do today is go back to bed. It won’t help and in fact, would make it worse. Two side benefits came out of my disciplined time with God:

Side Benefit 1: My Children Developed a Closer Relationship with Their Heavenly Father

My children grew up watching their mother spend daily time with God and saw the results of that. We also become more active in a church that had a major impact on their lives. Now, they have a close relationship with God. My daughter is in ministry and my son teaches a Bible Study. They both are active in church.

Side Benefit 2: My Children Developed a Closer Relationship With Their Earthly Father

In the 70’s, moms still took care of most childcare responsibilities. My children have a closer relationship with their dad because of that focused time with him every morning.

Action Steps

God has plans for you that include hope and a future. Listen to those plans carefully and do what He says. Those plans start with separating who you are from the pain you are in. Do what it takes to surrender false gods and spend time every day getting to know the one true God better. The previous articles on this blog deal with improving pain and related depression by loving God with your mind and heart. The next 2 articles will discuss pain and how you can reduce it by loving God with your strength and loving your neighbor as yourself. Until then, sooth your soul by:

• Spending disciplined time in meditation, prayer, and Bible study.
  
• Learning the difference between what helps healing and what simply masks symptoms and refocus all energy on what heals.
  
• Getting help for addictions.
  
• Making and reading daily a list of who you are in relationship with and your joys, responsibilities, and dreams.
  

================================================== Cheryle M. Touchton is the Director of Pocket Full of Change Ministries. For more information, to schedule a speaker for an event, or to make a donation, go to the website or call Gail Golden at 904 316-5462. Copyright: Pocket Full of Change Ministries

Heart Helps: The Secret to Dealing With Chronic Pain and Related Depression - Part 3

Heart Helps

By Cheryle M. Touchton
The Pocket Full of Quarters Lady


The Sh’ma: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself. Luke 10:27 NIV

“Listen to your heart,” a well-meaning person encouraged. When you hurt, there is no shortage of advice.


I tried listening to my heart and things got worse. I’d had a series of health problems that left me feeling broken. I was only 26 but felt 80. I hurt most of the time. My relationships were struggling. I envied my husband’s life and youthful body. That resentment drained my already floundering emotions, which added to my misery. The misery led to depression which sent me to bed. Staying in bed insured that my damaged body never got the exercise and blood flow it needed to heal. In short, I was stuck in a slimly pit of pain, self-pity, and inactivity. The problem with listening to my heart was that it lied. It whispered nasty things like:

• Eating chips will make you feel better.
  
• You need to stay in bed.
  
• Nobody loves you.
  
• There is no reason to try.
  
• You will never be happy.
  
• You will feel bad forever.
  
• That the pain means you cannot live your life.

These nasty indictments started a chain reaction that seemed impossible to break. Sound familiar? I’ve seen a similar pattern in countless people I’ve met in my missionary journeys across America. So what can you do? The answer is simple. You stomp your foot at your lying heart and decide that your heart’s only job is to love God completely. You combat negative emotions with the word of God.

Heart Help #1 Combat Negative Emotions With Scripture

You can replace every nefarious heart whisper with truth from the word of God. For example, thoughts about eating chips can morph into “My body is the temple of the Holy Ghost and doesn’t need junk food.” Your need to stay in bed can become “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Feeling unloved evaporates when you read what the Bible says about God’s love for you. When pain threatens to stop you from living, you remind yourself that Jesus’ did His greatest work as the world beat him and drove nails into His hands and feet. Read God’s word aloud to every wayward emotion.

Heart Help #2 Choose Happiness

Abraham Lincoln said that most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. I am still astounded at the power of that statement. When I was sick, hurting, and miserable, I had no idea I could choose happiness. When a mentor suggested it, I grew angry. He issued a two week positive thinking challenge. He instructed that I take two weeks and only allow positive thoughts in my head. He said that negative thoughts would sneak in but that I needed to immediately kick them out. It they lingered for more than five seconds, my two-week challenge was to start over. Since I had nothing to lose, I tried it. My first attempted didn’t last five minutes. I was astounded at how my unruly thoughts controlled my emotions and caused unhappiness. For example, I noticed the newspaper lying on the floor. My thoughts went like this. How many times had I asked Bob to put the newspaper away when he finished reading it. He didn’t even try to do what I wanted. If he loved me, he’d do what I asked. He must not love me. My feelings boiled their way to rage that caused me to lash out at my husband. When I tried to think positive, I discovered that anger at the scattered newspaper was a secondary emotion to grief about feeling unloved. That feeling was a lie. My husband loved me. Unfortunately, cleaning up newspapers was not one of his ways of showing it. When I focused on positive things about my husband, I started noticing all the other loving things he did. I felt better so I acted better. When I acted better, he grew more loving. Eventually, he even started putting the newspaper away. The same thing happened about pain. Thoughts of pain flooded my brain. Being female with a tendency to think in absolutes, my heart whispered words like, you hurt everywhere. Go to bed. You can’t do anything anyway. Those discouraging whispers were lies that doomed me to unhappiness. I didn’t really hurt everywhere – it just seemed like it. There was plenty of things I could still do. When I began focusing on possibilities, I began to accomplish more. My heart was encouraged by those accomplishments and I began to feel better about myself. It became easy to choose happiness. It took six months before I reached 2 weeks of positive thinking but my life improved every day during the process. Today, I know that if I am to love God with my entire heart, I must choose happiness no matter what else is going on.

Heart Help #3 Fire Self Pity

One of my favorite prayers is the Serenity Prayer. It begins with accepting the things I cannot change. Health problems had broken my heart and I was drowning in self pity. Accepting what I could not change meant firing self pity. I was shocked to discover that I almost enjoyed my feeling sorry for myself. After all, I’d earned it. An emergency hysterectomy at age twenty-five meant I’d never birth another child. I’d only had one baby and longed for more. No amount of time or positive thinking was going to change the fact that my body would not produce another child. I checked into adoption but my health problems made me a poor candidate. To get better emotionally, I had to accept the bitter fact that I was done making babies. Once I accepted it, my heart began to heal. Heart healing led to physical healing. When my body healed, adoption became a possibility. Today, I’m grateful for that hysterectomy because it lead to our adopting Kelley. Being around Kelley Touchton Pekarek is like having your own personal antidepressant machine. She brightens lives everywhere she goes. Self pity is a luxury that people living with chronic pain cannot allow. It may be the single biggest reason people stay stuck in their pain. Wallowing in negative emotions will keep you on the merry-go-round of pain that leads to depression that leads to more pain. The only way to stop it is to step off the merry-go-round completely.

Action Steps

Previous articles discuss improving your situation by loving God with your mind. The next 3 articles will discuss pain and how we can reduce it by loving God with our souls and strengths, and loving our neighbors as ourselves. Until then, help your heart:

• Chase away negative thoughts with the Word of God.
  
• Decide to be happy.
  
• Take the 2 week positive thinking challenge.
  
• Fire self-pity.
  

====================================================== Cheryle M. Touchton is the Director of Pocket Full of Change Ministries. For more information, to schedule a speaker for an event, or to make a donation, go to the website or call Gail Golden at 904 316-5462. Copyright: Pocket Full of Change Ministries